"and this emptiness fills my heart"

i will attempt to write love, as is warned against me. i will step right in, to the world of words and 4 letters and exactitude and type-o's and spelling errors. i want to learn to write it. my friend A won't partake in this journey of writing, so i am going to begin in the world alone.

i've been having dreams of testing the water, and each day i step in further.
my words can be understood or not, believed or not, but i know that they are coming from that cavernous blood-pumping hole in me, muscle pumping with confidence, i know it exists and i will risk my life with it, again and again.

two airports in one day. like the coming and going of stability in relationship. departing of words arriving of hurt. sensing, yet unable to construct comprehensible language as it comes out in improper ways. flattened underfoot, or swallowed in tears after passing through the dirt on my face.

yet i can't ignore the intensity. i feel my mouth fill with saliva, overflowing soon enough, my body and breath quickening.

[lets make this even cheezier- even tho i love this song...]

the double-imagery of the bird flying at the end is my favorite part